Not-So-Foreign Climbs

When it comes to exercise for exercise's sake I've never been much of a fan. Body sculpting and taking care of myself have never been good enough reasons for me to spend any real time in a gym and I honestly can't think of anything more boring than running without being late for something. And so we come to climbing. I've always enjoyed clambering about on things, rocks trees, scaffolding (not that I would ever do that when I was drunk, certainly not!). Luckily my job has always given me ample opportunity to climb on stuff (even if on occasion I've had to make sure no one else was around to see me 'safely' reach some otherwise inaccessible piece of equipment) but since I've trying to do less theatre work and more writing/drawing/podcasting/whatever this blog is I've found myself actually going to a place dedicated to exercise for exercise's sake and genuinely enjoying it.

I bought climbing shoes (which my left foot doesn't like after I broke a bone a while back leaving me with a slightly squinty toe):

And a chalk bag:

And I've mostly been going to a place called The Biscuit Factory. (Sadly they don't seem to have any good biscuits, just those protein/energy ones that have the taste of an old sponge and the consistency of Play-Doh).

In some ways I feel like it's taken me longer than it should have to get into climbing. I remember some years ago going to a climbing centre and having to get all harnessed up and use ropes for safety etc. and I just felt there was too much faffing (I'm stunned that the spell check in my browser recognises 'faffing', I totally thought it was just Scottish slang) about for me to enjoy it. The ropes got in the way and restricted my movement more than I was comfortable with, it just wasn't the same as when I used to climb rocks and trees in the park when I was a kid. So when I discovered I didn't have to do all that shit and could go bouldering instead (yeah, I know I could go soloing instead but I'm not fit or mental enough for that!) I suddenly became much more interested. I feel the need to point out I just like monkeying around on stuff, I'm not really interested in technique or actually getting better. I'm like a tennis player who just wants to hit the ball back and forth but isn't really interested in winning any points.

If you're expecting this to turn into some sort of relevant/interesting point then sorry (not sorry) to disappoint.

You can leave now.

Go on.




































Just fuck off will you?!